Actually
by Reija Linn
Summary: Just one normal day in Severus Snape's life.


Title: Actually  
Author: Reija Linn (T'Reija)  
Email/Feedback: theganan@gmx.de or thiari@theganan.de  
Archive: ff-net. Others please ask beforehand and leave the full header intact.  
Originally posted: hpslash list  
  
Pairing: very minor slash, Snape/?  
Rating: [PG-15]  
Summary: Just one normal day in Severus Snape's life.  
Spoilers: Haven't read the books? Do so. Right away. Do not eat, sleep or pause until you're finished. Then come back.  
Warnings: male/male sexuality and/or relationship(s) featured within. Don't like, don't read, don't flame. Simple really, though seemingly not simple enough for some dim witted clots out there.  
  
Legal disclaimer: I never have, nor ever will, owned the rights to the setting of the Harry Potter books or the characters featured within. The use of said settings and characters by me is for non-commercial purposes only and does not mean to infringe upon the given legal rights that belong to Ms. J.K.Rowling and those she has associated them with.  
  
  
ACTUALLY  
By T'Reija (December 2001)  
  
Actually, Severus Snape really enjoyed teaching. Most of his pupils, and, as a matter of fact, most of his colleagues thought he hated it. Bollocks, if he hated teaching, he wouldn't be doing it. After all, he, Severus Snape, was not a masochist.  
  
Quite to the contrary, really.  
  
This is easily demonstrated if we but view a single teaching day in Snape's life.  
  
Getting up in the morning at unearthly hours, drinking two cups of black mocha. Yup. That made the expression just right for teaching. He had actually, for a time, always kept a pile of lemon slices beneath his desk in his Potions classroom, to provide the fitting sour features his students detested so much, but he'd quit that habit since he had accidentally dropped one of those into a hair-dying potion - he'd walked around with lime-coloured hair for a fortnight, and knew he'd never hear the end of it. Fortunately, no students from that time were around anymore.  
  
Unfortunately, Bill and Charles Weasley reminded him of the incident every time they came to Hogwart's, which was, admittedly, not very often, but it did happen.  
  
Anyhow, let's get back to Professor Snape's typical school day. Where were we, again?  
  
Ah, first years in the first lesson - and first year Hufflepuffs and Gryffindors at that. Severus licked his lips hungrily, waiting for the first pupils to arrive. First years were always delighting. Scared at the mere sight of him, terrified of making any mistake, knowing he would ridicule them in front of the whole class for it...  
  
And there was so much they didn't know!!!  
  
"Harper... tell me the five ingredients to the flying potion!"  
  
Of course, flying potions were highly advanced, seventh year material.  
  
"Um... er... I'm sorry, Professor, but did we cover that?"  
  
Asked in a high, mousy, squeaking kind of voice.  
  
"I expect my pupils to do at least *some* basic research of their own volition... we're not in kindergarten, after all, Harper. Ten points from Hufflepuff!"  
  
Hehe. He enjoyed this. Especially those high-pitched, terrified first-year voices. And he liked it even more if they dared argue about the points, thus making it possible for him to double them.  
  
Oh, and then...  
  
Slytherin and Gryffindor fifth-years. Including his favourite pupil, Draco Malfoy, and his least favourite pupil, Harry Potter. And, of course, the wonderful Neville Longbottom. He sometimes wondered if Frank Longbottom had produced this son of his especially for his, Snape's, liking - after all, the boy didn't seem much good for anything else.  
  
"We'll start this lesson with a little test..."  
  
"B-b-but..." the Weasley boy stammered, "we're not prepared!"  
  
Snape's eyes glowed dangerously in the dark dungeon classroom. "Well, you always should be, Weasley! As you so graciously spoke up first, you can proceed to tell me the three main potions for which Atropa Belladonna is used."  
  
"Um..."  
  
"And no helping, Granger, or it's twenty points from Gryffindor!"  
  
"Um..."  
  
"Hah. Not quite prepared, Weasley? Five points from Gryffindor, and be glad it's not more. Goyle!"  
  
He gracefully overlooked Draco whispering to his friend.  
  
"Flying potions... vision-enhancing dreaming potions... and special healing potions."  
  
"Very nice. Well done, Goyle." Insert smug grin. Marvel at the ability of the bloke to even pronounce the word 'vision-enhancing'. "Five points to Slytherin. Okay, who wants to answer the next question - it's about your favourite, the Swelling Solution!"  
  
Ah, the joy of all those bowed heads, frantically looking in every direction but his, scuffling with papers, all those desperate elbow-nudges towards friends... the terrified glances...  
  
Now let's see... who's the most terrified of them all? Ah, easy. "Longbottom!"  
  
But, to be fair, he wasn't unkind. At least, he treated all pupils equally bad. Draco Malfoy, for example. Yeah, it was all nice and good while the boy was still around to give him blowjobs during their extra-classes. What the Malfoy boy didn't know was that he fully intended to give him a real bad Potions mark at the end of his seven years.  
  
Hehe. And he couldn't wait to see the utter look of horror on Draco's face.  
  
So, you see, Severus Snape actually *loved* teaching...  
  
THE END 


End file.
